real life

I'm the glamorous type.

I spent Friday night in bed with season 1 of Arrested Development.

(Long live the never nudes)(I forgot how gosh darn hysterical this show is)(Hashtag conformer)

On Saturday afternoon I got a wild hair and cleaned the pantry.

Let me say that one more time so my mother can let the truth soak in: I CLEANED THE PANTRY.

It was a hot mess.

Not only had a whole bag of quinoa kamikazied itself to the floor a few weeks ago, but so had my thing of black pepper. And apparently the pepper had a party on the spice shelf, too. And apparently the honey had spilled at some point. Do you see where this is going? Honey and pepper all over the pantry. Forever united with each other and the peeling white paint on the old shelves. It was an event.

But now it's clean and I can find the ziploc bags without having a meltdown. It's the little things that bring me joy, people. And then I cleaned the bathroom. What can I say? I live to party.

Anyway, it was all worth it when I could step out of the shower without getting rogue cat litter stuck to my foot. It's the glamorous life I'm after.

On Sunday I saw an old friend of my mom's. I haven't seen her since I was 12, so naturally I accidentally destroyed my nail polish on the way and discovered a strange black stain on the front of my peach colored shirt.

It's interesting to see someone who only knew you as a kid and then have an adult conversation with them and to hear their take on things that happened and people you both knew 15 years ago. It's crazy when she's sitting in your parents living room in Ohio when you so vividly remember her sitting on the hunter green leather couch in your parent's living room in Nevada in 1995 sporting her mom jeans and floofy 90s bangs. It's awesome how life comes full circle at times like this. It's encouraging to hear people who knew you as a timid and scared kid say that you grew up to be a good woman. It's full circle moments like this I live for. It makes me want to track down everyone from my childhood to let them know I turned out okay.  Like "hey, remember me? I still can't tan, but the gap between my two front teeth is gone and I don't cry when I have to leave my mommy's side anymore."

Ok, sometimes I do. But shhhhh.

I went to the gym after work yesterday. I was doin' work on the elliptical when I looked out at the girls laying by the pool. A guy walked up to his girlfriend and surprised her with a bouquet of flowers and a kiss. It was adorable. Something about seeing a guy love on his girl makes my heart all atwitter. But my reverie was interrupted by my own stank and my sports bra digging in to my back.

I went to Trader Joe's after my workout and a shower but NOT after dinner (aka HANGRY) because I needed my 11am snack of dry roasted unsalted pistachios, because the pecans just didn't cut the mustard today.


I rolled up to TJ's with no makeup, sweaty slicked up bangs, and a 5 year old Old Navy tank, still smelling of the gym despite my 90 second shower.

Glamour. Always glamour.

It's good to be me.


  1. I love spying cute couples. I witnessed a proposal last week at the park, and I was very nearly in tears.

    And about seeing adults who knew you as a kid now that you're both adults--it's almost a surreal experience. My little sister is working as a nanny for a guy that my Mom knew since both he and my Mom were kids together. He's apparently a little bit difficult to get along with at times and it's kind of funny to hear about them fighting it out these days just like we always heard about him and my Mom fighting constantly when they were kids.

  2. Oh my. When I moved into my husbands house his pantry was full of...electronics! I'm serious!!! And the next shelves were full of PAPERS! bills from years and years ago. It was a mess. I died. And sort of cleaned it and feel much better now. Poor men, they are so busy they can't clean!

  3. I really want to visit a trader joe and I can't wait (my friend is getting married and there is one in her town so after the wedding i'm going!) We are getting a "Fresh Market" in town, they are building it right now. But I hear TJ is better.

    It is weird when you see someone who knew you when you were young. Its odd to see yourself in their eyes and realize how dorky you are (at least, thats how I feel)

    I love how you embrace your awkwardness so well!

  4. NUTMEATS ...and I couldn't be mature about it.

    I found an exploded gallon of water in my panty on Saturday (ask Kelsey, she was there). I have no idea how things get so messy in there, you know? And about this quinoa...I need some recipes. I have some in my pantry and I need to use it.

    1. TRUE- I WITNESSED IT (and laughed at it)

  5. Not going to lie, this sounds like a dream weekend for me. But, you probably already knew that since we are essentially THE SAME PERSON, always.

    "Yeah, like I'm going to spill coffee all over this $3,000 suit! COME ON! Yeah, the guy wearing the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for the guy who doesn't make that in four months. COME ON! Yeah, like I'm going to take a whiz through this $5,000 suit! COME ON!"

    GOB is my favorite. And Buster.

  6. For some reason, seeing the word "nutmeat" makes me dissolve into giggles immediately.

  7. Paris Hilton needs to watch out, you're giving her a run for your money with that glamorous lifestyle.

    Cat litter goes everywhere. It's unbelievably frustrating, and we clean out bathroom floor at least once a week. It's never enough.

    I can totally tell you're getting ready to move. 100%

  8. Ah, I am such a lurker. I never know what to say in the comments! I just really enjoy reading your blog, it's so entertaining. :)

  9. I feel like Arrested Development was the right way to go after Lost. Good work! We just finished season 4. Hurry up because I have thoughts about it I need to discuss with someone!

    The effing cat litter. I'm still trying to teach the monster how to use the dustbuster. But she is ascared of LOUD NOISES.

  10. I most definitely cleaned the bathroom on Saturday night. And mopped. Crazy life over here.

  11. I'm dying at the phrase "got a wild hair" It struck me as just hilarious and I plan on using that in the future. Hope that's okay!! ;)

    And I get HANGRY too, glad we're in this together!

  12. Love the glamour! I went like that to Petsmart the other day and still got hit on by this creepy manager and it just made me seriously question his sanity.

  13. I am in the party of exactly 1 person so far that can't stand Arrested Development...haha. I don't know why, it just isn't funny to me. Isaiah likes it okay though, so I suffer through it sometimes. ;)

    You have given me motivation to clean my pantry, too. Yours sounds like mine...quinoa all over the floor and instead of honey, it's brown rice syrup. I'm pretty sure anything sticky in a pantry just spontaneously starts leaking, it's ridiculous.

  14. I use every opportunity in my life to say "nutmeats" and make everyone uncomfortable. It is SO FUN.

  15. Arrested Development = best comedy ever :)

  16. so great...i'm missing TJ's SOOO much right now. I swear i'm missing TJ's more than my own family. Is that bad? hahahah!

  17. Please come over. I'm needing some cleaning done around here as well, and it sounds like you are awesome at it. I can keep you up to date on Grey's Anatomy reruns while you work.

    But we don't have a pantry. I guess that's a good thing when it comes to cleaning?


Talk to me! If your email is linked to your account, I'll respond to you via email. If not, I'll respond to you right here.