9.10.2013

my hometown facebook news page strikes again


If you might remember, a few months ago I wrote a post introducing you my hometown's Facebook news page.  It's basically a group of citizens updating each other on crime and the goings-on around town. It's also the very best part of Facebook. Not one person can type in full sentences. No one understands the basic concepts of grammar, punctuation, and spelling. Most of them are just complete idiots. It's so bad, it's glorious.

Because I am a giving person, I collected a sampling of the things that occur in this special realm of the internet. Some are written by the mysterious powers-that-be behind Marion News, and some are from concerned citizens. I hope this makes your Tuesday less painful (or more painful, if bad spelling makes you want to take a knife to your eye).










You're welcome.

25 comments:

  1. THe one that stats with 'im up set' DID MY HEAD IN.
    Who are these people!?!!!

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  2. I AM DEAD OVER THE RACCOON ONE. WHY, WHY would you waste time taking a picture and posting it to a Facebook page if THERE IS A RABID ANIMAL IN YOUR HOUSE?!!?? I CANNOT.

    Also, I am beyond intrigued by the lady flagging traffic at 309 and Pole Lane. I MUST KNOW MORE.

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  3. "Things must be getting bad in Marion. PLZ PRAY"

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  4. Cannot handle the grammar and typos! AHHH.

    But seriously, why would anyone steal someone's fake leg?

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  5. hahaha I don't even know half of what I just read. But I do know one thing. things must be getting bad in marion where people got to rob the dollar store.

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  6. a majority of these posts are written in some kind of redneck code and it took all of my brainpower to decipher it.
    i just. i cant.

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  7. "drunk driver in fairpark has hit a few things already." This is the best news source ever. Also, do the traffic lady and state trooper hook up? You can't leave us with this kind of intrigue.

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  8. This is gold!! Although, I am really worried about the lady stuck in a house with a raccoon. I hope she made it out okay.

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  9. Stealing a fake leg is pretty low....and I would be way too freaked out by a raccoon in the house to think about a phone picture or facebook.

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  10. It honestly took me a few tries to figure out what a couple of them said hahaha -- the squirrel/dog one though, pure gold.

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  11. Is it really that hard to spell correctly and have the correct grammar?!?! IT DRIVES ME NUTS!

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  12. I hate you for making me literally LOL at my desk, which is directly next to a conference room where an important meeting is taking place. And by hate, I mean love :)

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  13. Oh my word! This is so hilarious!

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  14. "Things must be getting bad where people got to rob the dollar store."

    I'm dying.

    Although can I say that IF you feel the need to rob a store, why not make it a little more of a high class robbery? KMart might be a step up.

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  15. WHY WOULD ANYONE STEAL SOMEONE'S FAKE LEG.

    I am dead. I am writing this to you from the grave. I died laughing.

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  16. THEY WASN'T PUPPIES THEY WERE SQUIRRELS! Can I follow Marion News as well? I need to.

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  17. "Does any one know what to do????????????"

    Hahahahaha

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  18. hello i have a question HOW IS IT THAT YOU CAN EVEN PROPERLY FORM A SENTENCE COMING FROM THIS PLACE? I must know more about Marion!

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  19. I really need to follow this group on Facebook, it'd make my day so much funnier. You kept the best two for last, brilliant!

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  20. You and Angi need to get together and make a blog dedicated only to Marion News and Sitka's police blotter hahaha

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  21. The one about the leg... oh my gosh, the leg. And the puppies/squirrels!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    This shit happened in IN all the time. Cracked me up. I miss it so much it hurts.

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