3.20.2014

is there a flood or did you put your pants in the dryer again?


We've had to dress up for work this week, and since I no longer work at a place with a strict dress code, my business casual clothes are extremely limited. I have one pair of cropped black pants that I love and adore and cherish like they're my only child. I have two other pairs of dress pants: one several inches too long that can only be worn with heels (which I almost never wear because I can hardly stand up on a 1 inch heel, and also because I'm already extremely tall, but mostly because I can't walk in them), and one pair of pants about 1 inch too short. My favorite pair was dirty, and I was in no mood to wear tights and a dress or heels, so I grabbed the pair too short. They used to be my favorite pair, but then I must've accidentally stuck them in the dryer, and they've been channelling Steve Urkel and his high waters ever since. 

My lack of a business casual wardrobe also extends to my shoes. I figured I shouldn't wear my Chucks or Uggs with my dress clothes, so I wore a pair of red flats, since my other pair of flats is still in the breaking-in process, and I wasn't ready for that sort of commitment this late in the week. It was a glaring mistake, as the red shoes drew attention to my pants like a beacon in the night sky. And it's not like my pants could pass as cropped pants, because of course they were boot cut. The bottoms hung out around my ankles and flapped in the breeze whenever I walked like long hair in front of fan.  I flashed my ankles all around the office like a straight-up hussy. There was a party in my pants, and my ankles were the only ones not invited. It's a good thing this isn't a century ago, or I would've been kicked out of society for such lewdness.

I've also eaten a piece of birthday cake every day for the last 6 days (SOMEONE'S GOTTA DO IT), so not only are my pants too short, they're about to be too small. Despite the fact that I've talked about clothes more than usual lately, you can add this to the very long list of reasons I'll never have a fashion blog.

Brb, going to the gym.

JK, there's a corner piece of cake left and it's calling my name. 

8 comments:

  1. I hate having to play dress up at work. I have the same problem you do, but I have to wear business casual 4 days a week. I feel like I am constantly faking my way through the professional world with my clothes. Today, the dress pants I wore (that I have owned since my freshman year of college), didn't have a button because it popped off last week and I am too lazy to sew it back on.

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  2. Hashtag, tall girl problems. Why is it IMPOSSIBLE to find a pair of dress pants that are the right length? Regulars are too short, and talls are too tall. I buy talls and make my mom hem them for me. The struggle, my friend, is very real.

    However, I believe in rolling up an ankle pant just a smidge, and rocking flats. I did it last night. However, however, I do not recommend dry shaving your ankles first.

    GIMME YER OXFORDS.

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  3. Last night, Alissa said, AND I QUOTE "I'm rolling up my jeggings tonight, so I have to go shave my ankles"

    I am tres jealous of your work's laid back dress code. JUST ANOTHER REASON WHY I NEED TO MOVE TO COLUMBUS. I mean, we already have the same job anyway- I think I'm a shoo-in, right?

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  4. Umm what? You're tall?? How did I miss this? But it's okay, we can be giants together...5'10 over here! I'm telling you....KUT FROM THE KLOTH will save your jean woes. Hopefully. Don't be mad at me if they don't. :(

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  5. ahh. i just heart you and your sometimes struggles so much. it makes me feel a little bit better knowing there is someone out there that is just as much of a struggle street as i am. rock those flood pants!

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  6. Oh no, not the too-short pants! I've been on a mission of really, really trying to convince my excessively tall little sisters not to wear pants that are too-short. I'm worried that years from now, they'll look back on their teens and say, "Why did you let me wear those pants, Rachel!" Now at least I can tell them "I tried to tell you but you wouldn't listen!"

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  7. LOL. I love you. You can flash your Urkel Ankles around here anytime.

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  8. Oh man I hate this. I feel like pants are always either too short (regular) or too long (tall) - can we get a cut in the middle, please?!

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