5.28.2014

this is why I don't fit in, part 2

Every day I look at the women around me, and I notice that I am nothing like them. So I think it's time for a mini follow-up to my 24 reasons I'm an abnormal 24 year old woman.

1. I have yet to create a customized hashtag for my cat, my house, my marriage, and for each vacation I take. Oh, and I never will.

2. I despise cutsie terms like skinnies, sunnies, littles, etc. Whenever I see one of those words, I feel like it should be spoken to a four year old.

3. My ovaries don't "explode" when I see a baby on the street. I am not typically whacked over the head with baby fever in the presence of an un-potty trained human. Show me a kitten or a puppy and you'll get a much larger reaction out of me.

4. I still have no idea how to be friends with most girls. I can befriend a guy no matter where I go, but stick me in a group of girls and the majority of the time I will claw my way out of the room.

5. My wardrobe is mostly made up of black with various shades of blue and grey. Put anything neon or sparkly near me and I'll hiss at you.

6. I have never seen Gossip Girl, Scandal, or whatever that other show is...Pretty Little Liars? Not saying I'll never watch them, but I feel like I'm the only one who hasn't. I've been too busy rewatching Gilmore Girls and Saved By The Bell. <---If I were the hashtagging type, there would be a hashtag priorities right there.

7. Sometimes I go to Target....and I don't spend money.

8. I don't like sad things. I won't touch The Fault In Our Stars with a ten foot pole. Here's my reasoning: there's enough heartache and trouble in our own lives, so why would I want to subject myself to more? I will make exceptions for nonfiction, but when I read a novel/watch a movie, I want it to cheer me up, not make me cry myself to sleep.

I just watched the trailer out of curiosity. I still don't want to see it. Sorry, Alissa.

9. But why on earth would anyone spend $40 to have someone blow-dry their hair?

10. I don't have a Pinterest board for any future children. I never had one for my wedding.

11. I eat gluten.

12. To me, The Bachelorette isn't an IQ-dropping reality show. It's what I call a night to myself with unlimited chocolate and Netflix.


I could go on, but I'll spare you.


21 comments:

  1. I can make girl friends on the internet, but in person it's nearly impossible. Probably my feelings on anything anti-bachelorette and that I don't own any MAC makeup products.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Put anything neon or sparkly near me and I'll hiss at you." I LAUGHED SO HARD.

    I don't care that you don't fit in, because neither do I, most of the time. This list is basically 12 reasons why I love you.

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  3. I've refused to see movies because people tell me that they are "so sad." Finding Neverland being one. And my friend just told me about a movie I "have to see" but it's "so depressing" ...no thanks, won't do it! I'm invested in TFIOS because I read the book, and I love me some John Green word nerd.

    #pudgebuds

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    Replies
    1. FINDING NEVERLAND IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOVIES.

      I own the soundtrack.

      Delete
  4. I've never seen pretty little liars, and I don't want to. I met enough of them in high school.

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  5. #8 speaks straight to my soul. No thank you do I need to be reading anything that the pitch is "oh my god I cried so hard, but it was a *good* cry." No thanks - I already have too many emotions to keep in check without adding novel-based sadness.

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  6. my ovaries actually shrivel whenever i see babies. i can actually hear them scream out like nails on a chalkboard....NOOOOOOOO!

    i don't have a pinterest or instagram account. i've never paid more than twenty bucks for a haircut. i've never seen the bachelorette. and...bring on the gluten!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. but i do love sad things. i kind of love all emotions. i love angry things too.

      Delete
  7. im of the mindset where i dont even want to THINK about having babies til at least 30 and all my friends are trying to pop them out asap. uhm.. no. ew.

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  8. guilty of #2. don't shun me!

    i wish i was close enough to help you with #5. i would actually like it, because i'm not shopping for myself!

    angry face at you for #6. no scandal??? seriously?????

    dang, you're killing ME today with these. i've done #9 and liked it, because i didn't have to do it myself!

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  9. And again, I'm convinced we could be great friends :) Just say no to customized hashtags. Although I do have baby fever here and there, I can't stand when people talk about their ovaries exploding... it's gross and weirds me out! My closet has been mostly gray/black/white FOREVER but I'm definitely getting a lot better about adding colors/prints to it..... still no neon though ;)

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  10. When I first heard the term sunnies (which just autocorrected to dummies, appropriately enough) I couldn't believe it. Guffaw. I'm totally with you on The Fault In Our Stars. I have a few friends who have read it and keep asking me to. I was feeling the pressure and told my husband the premise and he forbid me to read it! Im thankful he knows me well enough to bring me to my senses! And yeah no baby fever here. I actually used to have it, like before marriage and maybe one year in but here I am 4 years later and I'm like NOOOOO. No babies. At least not now. I've never watched any of those shows either but I LOVE Gilmore Girls. And New Girl. And basically anything that comes on PBS.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think you just became my new best friend.

      Delete
  11. GOSSIP GIRL WAS MY LIFE. I love me some tacky opulence, you know? A fantasy world I live in...

    There are certain movies and shows I refuse to see. There was a movie a while back about sisters and dying and I was like NOPE. Parenthood? NOPE. And I quit Grey's Anatomy at a time where I had so many tears coming out of my face I didn't possibly need more. But some books are so beautifully written and powerful that they don't depress me, its like a good cry. Like, hell yea what a great story and why can't I write like that? Does that even make sense? WHATEVER.

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  12. Making friends with girls is hard. All of my real-life best friends are guys, or women that are related to me so they are my automatic friends (5 sisters come in handy....)
    I would never pay to get my hair dried, however, if someone wanted to pay me $40 to blow dry their hair I would be extremely happy to do it....

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  13. Give me a puppy on the street over someone else's baby any day. Also I will be your friend we can be awkward together aand eat gluten

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  14. Your comment about sad stuff? YES. I mean, I like emotional things and deepness and whatever.....but not often. I'm a little more emotional with books, but with movies all I want to watch are comedies. I like the feel good stuff.

    And for the record, TFioS wasn't a tear-jerker for me, anyways. That's probably a terrible thing to say, given the plot, but I was not emotionally attached at all. Maybe it's just that contemporary fiction really doesn't get to me.

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  15. Oh, and the ovaries term? Ew, no. I especially hate it when people are like 'BENNEDICT CUMBERBATCH! OVARIES EXPLODE.' no. I'm very much in control of my ovaries, thank you very much.

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  16. My nephew had a neon party this year for his 18th birthday. The Mr. and I went all out and bought ridiculous ankle warmers and head bands. We thought this was going to be a fun "let's make fun of the 80s party." I was horrified when re arrived and I realized neon is actually popular again. Everyone else was wearing normal shirts and pants just NEON ones. This is not okay to me. As for sad things, I'm with you when it comes to TV shows, but for some reason I love a good sad book. I ugly cried my way through The Fault on our Stars on an airplane. Looking back, this was not the wisest choice. I also just have to mention--did you know there's a whole website dedicated to creating brackets for every season of The Bachelor and Bachelorette? I did one for last season and actually happened to choose Nikki at the beginning, but it was such a lame-o season I haven't been able to bring myself to watch Andi. I'm sure I'll be back on the wagon next year though.

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  17. I TOTALLY get you on the befriending a guy better than hanging with gals, so me. I have also never seen none of those shows and I just went to Target a few days ago and didn't spend a dime. I also don't watch The Bachelorette, lol!

    I am a abnormal 26 year old with no kids...and I don't have the "fever" :)

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