1.13.2015

stream of consciousness, vol. 5



Oh, hello there. Yes, hi. Yes, I am feeling better. Thanks for asking! I hope you understood that through the 17 coughs I just hacked in your face. Clearly my health is still a work in progress.

I haven't had much to say lately except that right now I'm really regretting not getting Chipotle for dinner. No, really. The pizza thing from Trader Joe's that I just ate only made me hungrier and I'm too tired to do anything about it but whine. If I can't whine about the flu anymore, I'll whine about food. Flued? I'm really tired. James is bringing me home a cinnamon roll in a few hours, and that is the glue holding me together right now.

I have such little brain power that I had to pause Gilmore Girls to finish writing this. And it's the series finale which means James should probably bring me an extra cinnamon roll. I haven't watched this season since it aired my senior year of high school. My first period English teacher and I would dissect the intricacies of each episode every week and then discuss our knitting projects. If you're wondering, I was very popular in high school. Hashtag first chair clarinet. 

Speaking of knitting, it's all I want to do lately. I think it's the weather. I think it's the fact that I was couch-bound for a week with the plague. Whatever the reason, I dream in garter stitches now. I'm in the zone, finally. I have a hard time getting in the knitting zone because I'm slow, the progress is slow, and the whole process makes me feel like a toddler screaming ARE WE THERE YET in the back seat of someone's mini van. But I finally hit the zone and I don't want to stop. I almost brought my knitting to work so I could work on it during my lunch break, but I stopped myself. My office is entirely too trendy/too into running/not the knitting type, and I wasn't ready for the questions. In last week's team building exercise (grrrroooaaannn), I had to name my favorite movie. When I spouted out White Christmas, there was a sea of blank faces before me until my boss finally broke the silence and said "aww, well that's cute." So I keep the rest of my absurdity safely locked up during business hours. 

Man, why didn't I get Chipotle? Always get Chipotle. I'm about to eat my blanket.

In other news, I'm now watching football. Alone. The National Championship is on, and since I'm still on a Sugar Bowl high I pilfered my parent's long-in info so I can watch on the ESPN app on Apple TV. I'm going to be upfront: I have no idea what's going on. I need James or my dad here to help me out. The cheers of my neighbors are the only cue I have to go off of right now.

Can I tell you a secret? The one sport I understand and semi-enjoy is basketball. I have zero skills, but it's fun to play. You know, if you have to play a sport. I also mostly understand it, it's fast paced, and the games are inside. Anyway, for some reason, I keep transferring the rules of basketball to football. Every time someone catches the ball and runs, I immediately panic that they're traveling. I've internally yelled "BUT DON'T YOU HAVE TO DRIBBLE THE BALL? OR PASS IT?!" several times. Thankfully I have yet to yell this out loud, but more than once I've had a small internal anxiety attack over the fact that I'm the only one who notices the blatant traveling. Aren't you excited to invite me to your next football party? I'll just be over here with my knitting. 

You can stop rolling your eyes now.

I AM GOOD AT OTHER THINGS.

Ooo, touchdown! No one has to explain that to me.

Anyway, where was I? Oh, right. Things I'm good at. Aside from identifying touchdowns, of course. Driving myself crazy has to be at the top of the list right now. I always feel stressed and frustrated when the house is messy, but my hormones have put that on steroids lately. I OBSESS over things that are messy/not how I would like them. This place got messy during the holidays since we were out of town a lot, and then after New Years I got the flu, and things went from bad to worse. I had to lay on the couch while coughing and sputtering and dying and stare at the mess closing in on me. I finally felt well enough on Sunday to do something about it, and well, let's just say I found myself scrubbing the top of the refrigerator at one point. I also found myself at Target on Sunday night buying up their flannel sheets and duvet covers. The problem is, I wore myself out so much I didn't even have the energy to put the new sheets on the bed. And now I'm busy being a pseudo football fan, so they'll have to wait again.

I would tell you all about how I also bought a basket at Target (what I'm saying is that I went crazy) and dropped it twice and watched it roll through the slushy parking lot into oncoming traffic, but James just got home with cinnamon rolls.

Priorities. 


Update: OSU won the National Championship. The ESPN app kept freezing and buffering every 30 seconds, so I didn't find out we won until well after the rest of the country. I managed to keep my eyes open until 12:30 on a Monday night, which is no small miracle. I knit and drank tea through the whole thing like a proper lady. If I'm going to watch football, I might as well bring a little Downton Abbey to the table. 

12 comments:

  1. I decided at the end of the summer that I was going to be an Oregon Ducks fan this year, mostly because my college did not have a football team and Oregon is the same colors my school is- so I didn't have to buy anything new to support the cause. I mean, I know we lost the championship last night and all, but I think even though I chose them based on their colors alone, I did a pretty solid job. *pats self on back* BUT if anyone was going to beat us, I'm glad it was you guys!!!

    I would love for you to set up shop in your break room with all of your knitting supplies. Then send me a picture. THANKS.

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    1. I totes have an Oregon Ducks t-shirt, goodbye.

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  2. Woohoo OSU!!!!!! ;) you are so funny. I loved how random and goofy this post was. You're adorable....BUT I hope your health returns to 100% soon!!!

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  3. The director of my organization is from Ohio, and sent an email out last night to all staff AND board members (so, close 100 people) saying GO BUCKS! and all that jazz. You guys should hang out.

    I'm a Moe's girl myself (free salsa!) (do you have those in Ohio? I can't remember!) but I love a good burrito bowl from Chipotle. Oh, and their corn salsa. Oh, and brb while I go get one.

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  4. Knitting (crocheting)! Football! Tea! Cinnamon rolls! Finally feeling better! Too many exclamation points!

    Under normal circumstances I would totally be on the side of the Oregon Ducks, only because I'm originally from Oregon, but since I don't really care all that much about college ball I will say congratulations Ohio!!

    But...I hate basketball. I used to semi-enjoy the pro games but then the Seattle Supersonics left the area (STILL BITTER DO NOT GET ME STARTED) and any shred of appreciation I had for basketball left with them. Especially since they went to Oklahoma and became the Oklahoma Thunder and then all my "friends" from Oklahoma did nothing but gloat about stealing "my" team for the next two years and needless to say I don't talk to some of them anymore.


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  5. You are so hilarious! I have always loved the way you write. I read that super fast, because I feel like thats how you meant it to be, right? Haha. I have always wanted to learn knitting, but it just seems impossible when I see it. Oh, and basketball is my game! Love the Clippers!!

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  6. Best sentence: My first period English teacher and I would dissect the intricacies of each episode every week and then discuss our knitting projects. If you're wondering, I was very popular in high school. Hashtag first chair clarinet.

    Hashtag is Michelle using a hashtag?

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  7. Yes to knitting.

    Yes to cinnamon buns.

    Yes to clarinet but never quite first chair.

    One time at one of my wedding showers they asked what my favourite movie was. I said Love Actually. And my bridesmaid screamed, in front of all the old ladies from church, that it was pornography. It could be worse, your coworkers could think you're a sex addict.

    And I didn't know refrigerator tops needed to be scrubbed. I'm so unclean.

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  8. Always get Chipotle.

    And basketball is my worst sport. But I'm Canadian, so I feel that gives me a bit of a pass. Maybe?

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  9. Which show should I watch first...Parenthood or Gilmore Girls? NOOO, I haven't watched either one already.I know, kill me now.

    WHO ARE YOU?!?! ALWAYS GET CHIPOTLE!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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  10. Okay, yes, we all know...always get Chipotle. Also, I was once (for a short period of time) first chair trumpet...so go band. And, scrubbing the top of the refrigerator--LOL. YES. Bleach all the things (which is probably not the safest thing for a pregnant lady to be around?? eh). & What about the inside of our kitchen drawers? Immaculate. They have never been so tidy. "Nesting" they say.

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