gingerbread pancakes and eye doctors
There are not many things in life that I'm sure about, but I am sure that sometimes, when Christmas is right around the corner, you need to throw healthy eating out for a morning and make some gingerbread pancakes.
How's that for a run-on sentence? I'm here to make your Wednesday a little more chaotic, one run-on sentence at a time. Though if we're getting technical, I once had an editing professor who said as long as it's punctuated correctly, your sentence can be a mile long. I've chosen to agree with her.
Back to what's important: pancakes, of the gingerbread persuasion. I was going to make eggs and veggies, and then I was going to make waffles, but then I threw caution to the wind and grabbed the skillet instead.
This is such a wonky December. It's so bloody warm out there! Normally I would need therapy to deal with the lack of cold and snow, but it's kind of nice this year with a baby. I don't have to bundle her up every day, and we can still go on walks in the morning. And more walks means more room for things like gingerbread pancakes. No I haven't lost all the baby weight yet, why do you ask?
Anyway, it's the end of the year, and I am considerably overdue for all my doctor appointments. I put everything off until the last possible minute because I am terrified of all doctors. I would rather try to survive a tornado than go to an annual appointment of any kind. I wait until my hypochondriac tendencies reach a feverpitch before I put my big girl pants on and make a phone call. Even if I have to go to the eye doctor (the easiest doctor), I'm convinced she'll look at me and tell me my eyes are fine, but my kidneys are exploding. I'm always bracing myself for the worst possible news, and it's exhausting.
Calling to schedule an appointment is almost as stressful as the appointment itself. I forget all dates and times and what my phone number is and start to sweat everywhere. On Monday morning, I had a rare moment of courage, and I reached for my phone as soon as I got out of the shower and made all my appointments, several of which have to be rescheduled so my mom can watch Gracie, but I'm still putting that off, because phone calls. Anyway, it was Monday morning, I was calling my eye doctor and standing in my bedroom in my underwear because if I wasted any time in getting dressed, I would surely lose my courage. I made the appointment for Tuesday. The next day. It was soon, but I needed contacts and I was going to claw my face off if I had to wear my glasses for one more day.
It was going to take skill to get Gracie and me dressed and fed and out the door early, and of course our cat chose that night to wake Gracie up several times. Instead of just going back to sleep, Gracie chose that night to cry about it. I got roughly 2 hours of sleep. I didn't think I slept at all, but then I remembered dreaming I lived in Colorado and was being kicked out of the US (naturally). I woke up deliriously tired. I dropped Gracie off at my parent's house and went to the eye doctor, listening to slightly suggestive songs on the way because I could and because I WAS FREE. I walked into the eye doctor feeling like I was missing an arm, because being alone in public after 8 months of motherhood feels surreal and scary and like how the pilgrims must've felt as they left England for The New World. I usually go to the doctor armed with excuses on why they shouldn't dilate my eyes, but I was too tired to fight them, so I let them do it. I wanted to know if my kidneys were exploding. I was exhausted and somewhat blinded, and on some level I think it equated to legal intoxication. I was still hopped up on freedom, so I milked it a little more and drove down the street to surprise my dad at work.
I went back to my parent's house and reattached my arm/snuggled my baby. I laid down in a semi-comatose state and watched Fixer Upper reruns until my zombie eyeballs returned to their normal state, and I have to say, I understand why people love that show. It's delightful! I ripped myself away mid-farmhouse renovation to drive home before I fell asleep standing up. I was getting us ready to go and started to hand Gracie to my dad and asked him if he could hold her for a minute while I go change her diaper. Let us all praise the Lord that I got us home in one piece, where I later searched the medicine cabinet five separate times until I finally saw my allergy medicine right in front of me. It was a long day for us both, because Gracie took two 2 hours naps today.
I guess I should go to the doctor more often after all. Oh, and good news! My kidneys are fine.
As far as I know.
Basically what I'm saying is that you should go make yourself some gingerbread pancakes.