3.17.2016

ootd: the jorts that ate me

It is no shock to anyone who has read my blog for the past 5 minutes that fashion blogging is not my thing. While I like clothes and putting together outfits, I'm just not into posting 17 identical photos of myself in front of a brick wall or looking at pictures of you staring at your feet with one hand in your hair. It's cool; we can talk about other things.

However, back in the days of yesteryear (here, here, and here), I posted a series of outfit of the day posts featuring nightmarish childhood outfits of yore. I am happy to say I'm bringing them back. You're thrilled, I know. Last weekend, I happened across a photo album from our family trip to Disneyland in 2000. The pictures are so embarrassing I had to peek at them from behind my hands. Which means that obviously I am going to post one here for the entire world to see. #logic

Do you want to feel better about your awkward years? Just scroll down.






Things to note:

-The Minnie Mouse ears
-The tattoo choker
-The lollipop the size of my face
-The book of Disney character autographs
-Prescription sunglasses hanging around my neck
-See that red strap? And the water bottle by my side? That was a WATER BOTTLE HOLDER. I actually walked around like that all day. 
-Unintentionally flipping off the camera...it's like past Michelle knew how future Michelle would feel about this picture.
-The jorts that ate my entire southern hemisphere 
-Tarzan (he gave preteen Michelle the nervous sweats)

Not pictured: chunky brown sandals and a black velvet scrunchie. Could you die? I could die.


As you can see, being an 11-year-old Michelle was no easy task.

16 comments:

  1. Oh my gosh, I'm dying laughing. (You're so cute!) Honestly, the prescription glasses around the neck got me but then each line just kept getting better and better..! Haha!

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  2. Can you even BELIEVE those choker tattoo necklaces are back in style? Girls (or their parents) are still paying real money for them. I used to get mine from the vending machine at the grocery store while I waited for my mom to check out, and they cost 25 cents. I can't get over the resurgence of them, considering how hideous they really are.

    LOVE YOUR JORTS/YOU.

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  3. Did you just steal my childhood? Except I was afraid of denim at that age so I wore board shorts. I am also in love with your water bottle holder. It's like the more practical fanny pack!

    I feel like Tarzan is a little too provocative for Disneyland these days. I'm sure he gave a lot of people the nervous sweats!

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  4. tattoo chokers 4 LYFE!! oh my lord you are my teen fashion idol.

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  5. Oh my goodness, hahaha! I don't know though, my awkward stage was pretty bad too... ;-)

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  6. Hahahhaa! SO MANY FABULOUS things happening in this photo. Makes me want to go up to my parents and snag some vacation photos of the 90s of myself. I know for a fact there are NUMEROUS photos of me with jorts (sometimes in bright colors!) and a giant fanny pack that basically swallowed me whole haha!

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  7. I found a picture of myself the other day when my mom let me start doing my own hair and it was BAD, Michelle. It was so, so bad. It was also when I hadn't had braces yet and I too, was wearing a tattoo choker. Oh and that shirt that looked like it's for a doll, but then it stretched to be a normal shirt? Yeah- I was COOL.

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  8. I don't know what you're talking about. I kind of think a water bottle holder needs to make a comeback.

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  9. Hahaha I too had a water bottle holder and wore that clever contraption proudly. I was looking through old pictures recently and I think I wore strictly overalls for about three years.

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  10. Thank you for giving me my 1 minute of giggles for the day. SOOOOO great, I can't even!!

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  11. How I loved that style choker necklace back in the day! It would always get stuck in my hair when I was putting it on but that didn't stop me!

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  12. I was jealous of the girls who were cool enough to pull off the choker necklace look back in the day... I think that's even worse than admitting to having worn one!

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  13. I don't know. You don't have hair wings that rival red bull's. But yeah-scrunchies-jorts-I feel ya homegirl!
    However, let's not forget that it's Tarzan that has a weird musical note for a belly button. Moment of silence.

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    Replies
    1. I know...I have no idea what's happening on his stomach.

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  14. hahaha! but I'm actually pro-tattoo chokers and would still wear one. In fact, I do, because my nine year old sister bought me one as my Christmas present from her because she saw me wearing one in really old pictures and I thought that was the sweetest thing ever.
    But those shorts are pretty bad. I usually don't blame myself for what I wore as a kid because my parents had complete control over my wardrobe till I was like 12. My wardrobe improved immensely once I had some say in the matter.

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