11.17.2020

currently, november ed.




reading: The Last Year of the War by Susan Meissner. I’ve been working through a lot of the unread books I own, but I finally made a library trip for something other than picture books. This one is about life in the internment camps during WWII for those who were accused of possibly being enemies of the US. So far, it’s very depressing. Like, she’s trying to make it as agonizing as possible which is not what I need right now. I’m going to push a little further but I may not finish this one. 

watching: we just watched 60 Days In on Netflix, and now going to jail is at the top of my Worst Fears list. 

annoyed: that everything is breaking. Our baby monitor stopped charging unless you hold the charger just right, stand on your head, and say a prayer in Swahili. I sat on our bed Saturday afternoon and it CRASHED TO THE GROUND. Our garage door is only opening halfway. Our internet modem died. James works from home, so this is a problem. He grabbed a new one on his lunch break which opened a whole can of worms of internet issues including our Nest thermostat not connecting. And our power went out during a windstorm. All of this in 48 hours. It was a very 2020 kind of weekend. I almost added my Kitchenaid mixer to the list. I plugged it in three times and it still wouldn't work. Turns out, I had been unplugging and plugging in the toaster three times in a row. I also had to rewrite this entire blog post because I clicked saved and then exited, but save it did not. So that's how I'm doing lately.

weary of: Zoom. Zoom is going to be a trigger word for all of us once this *gestures broadly* whole thing is over. A few weeks ago, during a particularly bad day, I was doing Zoom BSF when one of my children was sent to timeout and was screaming “LET ME OUT” right as I was forced to unmute myself and answer a question because I was the only one who did my lesson. Once the class ended, I realized Clara had grabbed my pen, clicked it open, and drew all over her face and onesie. Last week I did my BSF class while holding a squirmy baby and homeschooling. I needed a nap afterwards. I did not get a nap. This is what I get for poking fun at the girl folding underwear on camera.  

drinking: raspberry tea with lemon and honey. My neighbor makes a pot of raspberry tea whenever we visit, and she always puts fresh lemon and honey in it. Now Gracie and I make it all the time. It’s so good. But right this minute, I’m drinking lime sparkling water out of a tiny pink plastic Disney princess teacup, courtesy of my 5 year old. 

eating: I made a butternut squash, kale, white cheddar, sausage quiche with homemade raisin cinnamon bread. I’m trying to make new things. I made chicken shawarma the other day and it was amazing. I also made lactation cookies less for my milk supply and more for an excuse to eat cookies.

feeling: grief over life. This is not how I’ve wanted Clara’s first year to be. This is not how I wanted Gracie's kindergarten year to be. While sick and pregnant, I sustained myself with thoughts that a year later we would be going to library storytime, homeschool groups, church, playdates, etc. Literally none of that is happening. Clara has only ever seen strangers with masks on, and I am just NOT ok with that. We had just made the decision last week to start going back to church (a long story there), and the next day we got an email that church would be meeting over Zoom. I cried. I love church the very most during the holidays. I have been so excited to take Clara to church at Christmas time. Now the restrictions are piling on again with likely a lockdown in the future. The people screaming for shutdowns clearly do not have young children. This is no way for anyone to live. Mental health is every bit as important as physical health. I was keeping my chin up fairly well during most of this, but with winter on the way and having to stay inside more due to the cold and lack of light, I've been in a royal funk.

buying: BOOKS. So many books! Thanksgiving books! Christmas books! Winter books! Seasonal kids books are my love language. Not much gets me really excited, but festive books? Sign me the heck up. I'm a Thriftbooks frequent flyer these days.

staring at: my Christmas tree. Yes, it's up. And honestly I don't feel that jolly about it, though I love the glow in the morning when I'm reading and it was cozy when we got some snow flurries this morning. As we were decorating it, I suddenly felt very Blah about all our ornaments. We have some special ones and vintage ones that I adore, but most are ones we got when we were first married, and I'm over it. I also don't have a budget for a whole tree full of new ornaments. What a 2020 thing to feel. Maybe it's just my funk. I also have pumpkin decorations out right next to the tree still, so I need to pull it together and get the rest of my Christmas stuff out. It will help. 

snapping photos of: this stuff. Here's some random photos of what we've been up to:

We love tromping through the woods behind the house. And then our neighbor usually spots us and invites us in for tea and snacks. 


Dunkin' has a surprisingly good gingerbread latte. I impulse ordered one on the way to the library sans kids over the weekend. Was it amazing to get coffee and books alone? It's hard to say. But yes.
Some homeschool stuff: Gracie dug up dinosaur bones in kinetic sand and classified them (number, upper and lowercase letters) for school. And yes, she's in her pajamas because Fridays are school in pajamas days.
The girls are sharing a room, which is a whole thing I have thoughts about. But I love this wall over Clara's crib. It makes me so happy to look at when I'm rocking her.

 

7 months old and perfect in every way. I can't get enough of her.
Now that it's dark early and cold out, the evening hours are looooooooong.
Surviving Till Bedtime with a Fussy Baby: A Portrait
James put Clara in the doll stroller. 

Anyway, are you feeling festive? How are you planning to survive the winter? How many books is too many? Why am I so hungry? How do you entertain an energetic 5 year old when it's freezing? If you're one of those with all your family and friends around and life is normal, you can buzz off. I mean that nicely....ish :)

6 comments:

  1. That dino dig for homeschooling looks so cute! What a neat idea :) these pictures are lovely, and I'm glad that you guys are making some good memories in this crazy year. I hope you hang in there, and I'll be praying for you! The whole cold weather thing really hit me earlier, the realization that life is suddenly going to get a bit more isolated again...one of my 81 year old neighbors has been doing weekly outdoor concerts since the summer, but she just told me that today's concert will probably be the last one, since it's starting to get cold and dark early. This year has been a great reminder for me to not take anything for granted!

    Also, I am so sorry to hear that you won't be able to be at church for the holidays! That sounds so hard and awful and is so sad. Our church hasn't announced anything yet, and I've been wondering what they're going to do. I imagine that Oklahoma isn't being as eager with restrictions as Ohio, but I wouldn't be surprised if some restrictions start falling back into place in the coming weeks.

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  2. "The people screaming for shutdowns clearly do not have young children."

    No, but they have dead family and friends as a result of a preventable pandemic. 248,000 deaths, in fact.

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  3. "The people screaming for shutdowns clearly do not have young children."

    No, but they have dead family and friends as a result of a preventable pandemic. 248,000 deaths, in fact.

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  4. “The people screaming for shutdowns clearly do not have young children.”

    LOL TRUTH. They also don’t follow the true science/facts, just sound bites and CNN. If shutdowns worked they would...you know...work?? Yet here we are. Shut out of restaurants and grocery stores where SCIENCE AND DATA show people are less than 1% likely to actually catch the virus.

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  5. This is defnitely testing everyone's sanity, isnt' it? I always feel so bad for moms with young children that are limited on where to work the kids energy at & I get how its sad to not have the kids holidays be "normal"... just try & think of it as a blessing in taht you'll never have this alone time with them again. Soon, it'll be run run run, here there here there again. It will be - hang in there.

    I havent been back to church since March. Since I work wtih the youth, I see their instagram feeds & the parties & gatherings they have. AInt going around those germ fest people LOL I'm good with church in my jammies.

    I have bought more books than ever... but cant read. How messed up is that?

    Gingerbread latte... I've never had one, but that sounds really yummy... festive even!

    Sending you hugs my friend!!!

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  6. The restrictions that are coming down on everything again seem a little too late. Here in Kansas, it's called "uncontrollable spread". So...how is locking everything down going to help?
    It makes my heart ache to know what kids and the elderly are going through. We (being adults) probably have the best coping skills!

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